He could be everything I've ever wanted.
“Sherry, wait. Hold on,” I said into the receiver as I jumped out of bed and rushed into the bathroom and shut the door behind me. “What are you talking about?”
“Your mom told me everything about the baby and your wedding. And you really can’t have the baby. It’s a huge mistake,” she relayed with great urgency. My stomach dropped again, twisted in tight knots of baby hormones and now more drama. Patrick called for me from the other room to make sure I was okay and I didn’t know what to tell him. No, I’m not okay. The hurdles seemingly never end. If it’s not one thing, it’s always another…
“Yeah, just on the phone with a friend. I’ll need a minute,” I told him through the walls. “Sherry, everything is fine with me and I am happy with my decision. Everything is fine,” I tried to convince her. And myself.
“Missy, I’m a lot older than you and have more experience in life. Just hear me out and please reconsider what you are doing,” she explained. Even though I’d always considered Sherry a part of my generation, she was in fact on the teetering edge of it since she is more than ten years my senior. Living on the other side of the country, I didn’t get to see her in person much anymore but we had the type of chemistry where months could pass before we spoke to each other again and it would still seem like we talked everyday.
“I’ve never told anyone this before,” Sherry continued, “but I got pregnant with a boyfriend of mine when I was 17 and then another time in my 20s. I got an abortion both times and I am so glad I did. The guys weren’t right for me and I was in no position to have a baby. I was a child myself!”
“Really? Wow, I had no idea. So why don’t you have kids now?” I asked her.
“Money. Sean and I need to make sure we are financially stable first before we can support a family. But what I am saying is a lot of people get abortions but never tell anyone about it if they get pregnant at the wrong time with the wrong guy. I think you must reconsider what kind of a life you are setting yourself up for. We all worry about you and I know you want to keep your baby. But from what I’ve heard, you and Patrick had a lot of issues in the past and they won’t just go away with a baby. They will get worse with the stress of a child. Really think if Patrick is the right guy for you, if he is who you want your husband to be. Make sure you are not selling yourself short,” Sherry went on to say.
“Trust me, I’ve thought about it all and I will never get an abortion. Patrick and I are committed to working things out and he could be everything I’ve ever wanted,” I rebutted.
“COULD BE, Missy! But is he now?? Just because you get pregnant doesn’t mean you have to have the child, and it doesn’t mean you have to marry the father.”
Is Patrick everything I’ve ever wanted? Is he all of that…NOW?
“Sherry, I hear what you’re saying but I am sure this is what I want,” I assured her of my decision.
“Okay, it’s your life but I just wanted to remind you that you have options and you are not stuck in any situation you don’t want to be in. I support you and everyone will love your baby no matter what. I’ll see you at your wedding and until then, please call me if you need anything,” Sherry said before hanging up. I sat down by the bathroom sink, my head echoing with the revelations I just found out about my dear friend, and I needed a minute to myself before I could go back into Patrick’s room to hang out for the rest of the night.
A part of me felt so bad for Sherry that she had to carry around her abortion secret with her for so many years and a part of me felt angry that yet again, another person wanted me to just get rid of my baby as if it were that simple. I looked down at my stomach and from the outside, I was still not showing and I myself had a hard time believing I was growing a life inside of me. That something so small could have such a huge impact on my life.
Part 2 coming tomorrow...